The Wu Wufei?!
by Msmelanie
Summary: Before Pai met Yakumo, she chose someone else as her Wu...


Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing and I don't own 3*3 Eyes either. I make no profit off of this at all.  
  
The Wu Wufei?  
  
Before meeting Yakumo, Pai took another excursion to find the right wu. So, she saw a man standing by a corner.  
  
"Hi! I Pai! Pai want to be human!" Pai said  
  
Wufei just ignored her.  
  
"Pai save save you! Be Wu and Pai save you!" Pai continued.  
  
Wufei continued to ignore her.  
  
"Hey, you wretched human! Talk back when a Demon-god is addressing you!" Sanjiyan said as she took over Pai.  
  
Wufei turned his head toward Pai, wondering how her attitude changed so fast. "Leave me alone, woman."  
  
The next thing Wufei knew he was pushed down the street and knocked into a dumpster.  
  
"Do not address me in such a manner slave!" Sanjiyan yelled.  
  
Wufei stuck his head out of the dumpster and took off a banana peel that was resting on his head. "Slave? I am not a woman's slave!"  
  
"You are my slave, miscreant!" Sanjiyan yelled. "Look at the top of your forehead!!"  
  
Wufei felt the top of his forehead and felt a mark. "What did you do to me?!"  
  
"You are my slave. My wu." Sanjiyan explained. "You have immortality until I die."  
  
"Immortality?" Wufei asked interested.  
  
"Yes, until I cease to be." Sanjiyan replied.  
  
"So, I could be cut up into a million pieces and I wouldn't die." Wufei asked rhetorically.  
  
"Yes." Sanjiyan replied.  
  
"Or blown up?" Wufei continued.  
  
"Yes." Sanjiyan replied again.  
  
"So, I could cut off Duo's braid and he could never kill me?" Wufei asked again.  
  
"Yes, Wu!" Sanjiyan replied again.  
  
Wufei the Wu? Hmmm...doesn't sound too bad. Wufei thought.  
  
"Let's go slave, we need to-" began Sanjiyan until she realized that Wufei had taken off. "What?! Where did my slave go?!!"  
  
To Duo and Hilde's house...  
  
"Where's Maxwell?!" Wufei shouted as he burst through the front door.  
  
Hilde turned around and looked at him. "Maxwell? Oh, Duo! He's not here right now."  
  
"Where is he?!" Wufei shouted angrily.  
  
"I'm not sure. Duo didn't tell me." Hilde replied.  
  
"Oh, fine! Then I'll take you until he comes back!" Wufei shouted.  
  
"What?!" Hilde shouted. Before she could react Wufei knocked her unconscious and carried her out the door.  
  
"Next, Yuy's." Wufei remarked.  
  
To Heero's apartment...  
  
"Heero!" Wufei yelled as he dropped a huge bag that now contained Hilde. "Let's fight!"  
  
"Fight?" Heero asked uninterested from behind his computer.  
  
"Yes!" Wufei shouted.  
  
Heero heard Hilde's muffling from inside the bag. "You kidnapped Hilde Schbeiker? That was stupid."  
  
"Forget her! Let's fight!" Wufei shouted again.  
  
"Hn. I don't feel like it. I'm surfing." Heero replied.  
  
"What?" Wufei asked.  
  
"On Teardrop In The Ocean. It's great, you should check it out." Heero replied.  
  
"You weakling, fight!" Wufei yelled.  
  
Heero ignored his comment. "You should let her go, Duo won't like that."  
  
"Fight, or I'll tell the other pilots about your secret love letter!" Wufei yelled.  
  
"What?" Heero growled. "You wouldn't dare..."  
  
Wufei smirked evilly. "Weakling. Falling over a woman like that. Pathetic."  
  
"Shut up! Omae O Korosu!!" Heero shouted as he leaped toward Wufei.  
  
So, Heero and Wufei fought....and fought....until....  
  
"What's going on, Wufei? Why do you keep healing?" Heero gasped as he hit the floor.  
  
"I am the wu Wufei now! I can't die!" Wufei shouted. "I have won this match, and now I'm going to see the Desert Prince." He said as he dragged his Hilde-bag away with him.  
  
To Quatre's mansion...  
  
"You smell, you're a weakling, you have no integrity!" Wufei yelled at Quatre.  
  
Quatrre covered his ears. "Wufei, why are you saying such things?! Don't you remember the time I sacrificed myself and Sandrock so you and Duo could make it to outer space?"  
  
"I showed you honor by making it into outer space...and I did." Wufei replied. "Now, where was I? Oh, yes. Women are stronger than you! Women have more integrity than you!"  
  
After Wufei had fought off enough Maguanacs to last a life-time he got bored, so he grabbed his Hilde-bag and took her to the circus...  
  
To the circus...  
  
Trowa stood still while Catherine threw her knives.She had one more ready to throw when-  
  
"You weakling! Staying here to work with a woman!" Trowa heard from the stands.  
  
"Wufei?" Trowa said to himself.  
  
"Momma's boy! Pansy! A regular little Quatre!" Wufei yelled out again.  
  
"Wufei?! How dare you speak to me like that!" Trowa ripped off the buckles that were holding him secure. Wufei jumped down from the audience and Trowa flipped over to him.  
  
"Try as you might, you won't kill me!" Wufei shouted.  
  
So Wufei and Trowa fought....and fought...it was getting later...the audience was starting to go home...  
  
"Why won't you stop healing?" Trowa finally asked.  
  
"I am the Wu Wufei! Nothing can kill me!" Wufei shouted as he jumped back up to where he was sitting previously to grab his bag.  
  
Later at Wufei's place...  
  
"Make sure you add enough pepper when you cook dinner." Wufei said from his computer.  
  
"Doesn't a girl cooking your food and doing the chores for nothing lessen your integrity?!" Hilde shouted from the floor she was cleaning.  
  
"I'm immortal! I'm higher than integrity-and clean those floors better woman!" Wufei shouted.  
  
"Wufei!!" Wufei heard from outside.  
  
"A-ha! Maxwell! Now is the chance I've been waiting for!" he yelled as he grabbed his sword. "Your braid is mine!"  
  
Duo stepped in the door unafraid. "Taking Hilde was a big mistake, buddy!"  
  
Wufei ran toward Duo when all of a sudden he was pushed back and smashed into a wall.  
  
Duo smiled. "I talked to the other pilots and found out you were immortal. The god of death was thinking he'd give his life for Hilde, but...I ran across a friend of yours destroying the lower side of the colony." Duo grinned bigger. "Like a good friend, I decided to bring her to you, so here she is..." Duo got out of the way...  
  
"Wu!!" Sanjiyan yelled at Wufei. "Leaving me was a big mistake! You'll pay twice as much for this!!" Then, Sanjiyan held him in Midair and grinned as she threw him against the wall again.  
  
"Alright! Hey Sanji? Could you hold on a minute?" Duo asked the Sanjiyan. "Let me get the rest of the guys. They can't miss Wufei getting beat up by a girl!"  
  
"She's not human!" Wufei protested.  
  
"She's still a girl, wussy." Duo replied.  
  
Sanjiyan smiled. "Don't take long!"  
  
In five minutes, the guys all landed.  
  
"We heard the news." Trowa replied. "We thought the Gundams would get us here the fastest."  
  
"I brought the cameras!" Quatre replied.  
  
Heero held up the film.  
  
"I brought you some popcorn from Wufei's refrigerator!" Hilde said. "Extra butter!"  
  
"Okay, you can beat him up now." Duo replied as everyone sat down.  
  
So the guys watched, took pictures, enjoyed their popcorn, and laughed their heads off at Wufei.  
  
One hour later...  
  
"-and I'll take that mark back! You do not deserve to be a wu!" Sanjiyan yelled as she took away his mark. "Maybe there's someone else on Earth who deserves to be my wu." she said as she left.  
  
Wufei limped over to the others. "Did you enjoy yourselves while I was being pulverized?!"  
  
"Sure did!" Duo said grinning back . "You have excellent popcorn too, Wufei. Where do you shop?"  
  
Wufei dropped down to his knees. "I had it. I had immortality...and then it was gone."  
  
"Well you know what they say." Duo replied. "It's better to have been a wu once, than to never have been a wu at all."  
  
The End! 


End file.
